Baby Payne #4 Gender Reveal (5/7/16)

Dear Gage, Gabe and Grant,

It's been a long while since I've written and a lot of things have happened. I want to start with some events that occurred earlier in the year and hopefully I'll get caught up to the chaos that is life as we know it.

Grant, when I was pregnant with you, I wanted your gender to be a surprise. We had the anatomy ultrasound when I was around 19 weeks pregnant and your Auntie NeeNee was there to find out the gender. Roy, the ultrasound technician, pulled her to the side and told her the gender. She was sworn to secrecy with the information, but having her know was a back up in case I couldn't wait until your birth. When I found out I was pregnant with baby Payne #4, Daddy said I couldn't wait until the birth to see if you all would be having a baby brother or baby sister. There was a lot of anxiety with not knowing the gender. Grant, you being a boy worked out so well since we already had everything we needed. If you had been a girl, you would have worn a lot of blue until we could get you a proper baby girl wardrobe.

So for baby Payne #4, we had the anatomy scan at 19 weeks. I had thought about having a gender reveal party with close friends and family, but decided just to have our own little gender reveal on Mother's Day. Roy wrote down the gender on a piece of paper and sealed it up in an envelope. We put the envelope in the safe and the plan was for Daddy to open it close to Mother's Day and make me either a blue or pink cake. I worked the weekend of Mother's Day and on that Saturday while I was sleeping during the day, I awoke to the smell of cake. It was still too early to get up, so I laid in bed trying to figure out if I was smelling a vanilla cake or a strawberry cake. When I finally did get out of bed, all three of you boys were napping. Apparently you all had had a fun filled day of playing outside and needed the rest. I saw the cake sitting on the china cabinet and the bell jar was covered with a towel. I ate dinner and stared at the cake. I wanted so bad to cut the cake but I also wanted to wait until the following day to get my Mother's Day surprise.

Daddy made a pretty cake

 After I got ready for work, I stood in the kitchen staring at the cake. I took a knife and stood over the cake, trying to decide if I wanted to cut it or not. I was just so nervous. What if it's blue? I'll always be a boy mom. What if it's pink? I don't have any girls. I don't know what I'll do with a girl. Bows, dresses, PINK. So much anticipation, so much anxiety, so much excitement. I ultimately decided to cut the cake and with the first cut, I saw the pink poking out from underneath the white icing. A girl!! I'm going to have a daughter!! I cried tears of joy and your Daddy gave me a big hug. He was so excited for me and for our baby girl!.

 

I didn't have any time to eat my pink cake since I had to get to work, so I packed a piece to eat later. All I could think about on the drive to the WAG was my baby girl. I can't believe I'm going to have a daughter. What am I going to do with a daughter? How am I going to raise her to be a strong, independent woman? So many worries, but so much excitement for this change in our lives.

I was excited to share the news, so I showed my technicians the cake once it slowed down a bit at work. I cried when I revealed the cake and Curstain shed some tears of joy for me. She knew how much I wanted a baby girl and of course everyone is so excited to spoil her.

When I got home the next morning, I talked with you all about the baby and you all were very excited for a baby sister, especially you Gage. You've already got two baby brothers so a baby sister is going to be quite a change for you.

The next four months was spent preparing for baby girl - new bedding, new decor, baby showers and lots of pink. Such a change from the blue that dominates our home.

I love you,
Mommy